can I not meet or have my wife meet someone who's likes or who's boyfriend really likes metal. I swear every time I meet an acquaintance and they find out that I like metal or my wife meets someone who's boyfriend likes metal they always like Mushroomhead (a product of living in NE Ohio), Pantera, Metallica and a host of horrendous new surface level bands. It's impossibly aggravating because never once do they understand that the bands they like and what I like share only a tiny shred of common ground.

The latest, a coworker of my wife's has a boyfriend in a metal band. He's in his mid-20s and his favorite bands are Pantera and Metallica and one of the top influences for his band is Annotations of an Autopsy, along with Hatebreed, Lamb of God, Mushroomhead, Pantera, Metallica and 5-6 other cliche'd modern bands. She was so excited to hear I liked metal and has invited me to see his band a couple times, next time opening for Mushroomhead in December. His band Onehitkill is disastrously bad.

I maintain that I'd rather have everyone in the world listen to rap and country than have to explain to some new person that, though I like metal, I don't like any of the metal they do. Then I have to list a bunch of bands they don't know and they inevitable throw out a couple surface level bands I hate and ask if I enjoy them (Dragonforce, Children of Bodom, Killswitch Engage, whatever). Inevitably the answer is no.

One time let me meet "random underground metal guy." It'd be so much easier.

/rant

Cuz I moved. Your social life revolved around me.

I share this predicament absolutely.

Heh, it's what I get for living in a predominantly Mennonite / trad Dutch community...

Craigslist?

People still listen to Mushroomhead?

^^ You missed robofist's thread about putting up Rock 'N Roll Outlaw awhile back, didn't you?

Plus, the term 'Mushroomhead" can be very offensive to oriental persons.

People actually started listening to Mushroomhead?

Do you live in Ladner or something ?

Heh, no... Chilliwack countryside.

Oh, that's figures. *chills*

On the upside, if they ever have NW Metalfest out there agin, you won't have far to go.

Indeed... How I wish I was knowledgable of such bands back in 2007...

could be worse. When my brother-in-law learned I liked metal he said "oh, like Linkin Park"

I used to feel the pain. I'm lucky to work/study up at a university, so, while there are a lot of guys/gals walking around in Trivium/Lamb of God/Cradle of Filth shirts, you do see the odd Carcass shirt or Krisiun or whatever more 'obscure' pollock-esque black metal spatterfest. I'm in a service environment where they have to come up to me so it's always easy to strike up a convo. Yesterday I had a chick with an Anonymus shirt, for example. Pretty cool, she was telling me about seeing them in Montreal regularly with a 1,000 people; here they drew 25!

Anyway I guess I'm 'lucky' that way. Another thing I do is (just starting) volunteer at the uni radio station and will get my own show; that'll put me in touch with the local bands and people in the scene. Just stuff to try. Go to the local shows. Obvious stuff. They're out there!

You think you're the only one? Try living where I live!!

I don't advertise anything about what music I listen to when I meet people. If they happen to hear something I'm listening to, so be it, but if I'm in a public setting it's rarely metal anyway.

I know what youre sayin'
I have only one friend that understands and appreciates and that i can talk to about all thing metal, underground and otherwise. People look at us like were nuts when we go on about this band or that band. The more obscure the better, although not limited to that. Its great though.
Its funny though, cause in a way, isnt that why we're all on the BRaveboard? For me, this is a place i can come and mingle ( online ) with other metal heads, who share the same passion for it that i do. Im not a veteran of this board by any means, but since ive been on here, ive talked to people from all over, and learned about bands i may not have been interested in before. I love You guys!

I don't have a single friend who digs this kind of stuff. It's very frustrating. My wife is more of a punk fan too. She humors my metal discussions and goes to shows with me but she's just being a great wife and trying to make me happy.

I think you are forgetting that nobody listens to that headbanger "kill your mother" stuff anymore.

I truly lucked out when we moved across the country.

When we first moved in, the wife of the guy next door was talking to my wife, and she mentioned something about him liking metal. Of course my wife summoned me, and I asked her what he liked-- she replied, "Oh, that obscure European stuff with the makeup".

I thought, "Awesome, black metal next door..."

Then I found out they had just been to an Ark show and he was a big-time prog/power dude, and didn't really know about black metal...

But over the 8 years we've been here, my tastes have softened a bit and his have gotten heavier and we've been to a slew of shows, ranging from Quiet Riot to Cannibal Corpse to Jucifer to Angra to Agnostic Front to Kataklysm to Helloween to Fu Manchu and on and on....

Zeke's Neighbor rules.

But yeah, Mak, I feel your pain. I'm used to that as well-- "oh yeah, my husband likes that heavy stuff too-- he was into Puddle of Mudd and Nickelback before they were popular".

I feel your pain brother, although it's much worse for me. Most people we meet don't like metal at all or USE to like it. How the fuck can you USE to like metal? I you don't like metal anymore then you never were a real metal fan in the first place. Pisses me off.

...then some of them will look at you like you're somewhat retarded or juvenile because you still listen to it.

MHM.

I consider myself REALLY lucky to have all my closest friends and signifigant other being fans of the same stuff I am. I wouldn't really want it to be any other way. For the most part, I've found I don't jive with most people who feel that "music is just background noise", or that say "Metal? Yeah, me too! I love Creed!". Sure, I can talk about other stuff and whatnot, but at the very core, it rarely goes beyond being an "aquaintance" type thing because those people just don't understand being passionate about metal (and music in general) or why I would dedicate so much time to it.

I know what you're saying.


When someone realize I like metal (for instance, by being in my car up front, opening the glove box and finding cds with strange logos and weird artwork I usually get the "you like this kind of stuff?") what usually happen is people will say "I like metal too, what do you listen to?" And then I don't know what to say... So they usually end up asking me "do you like Metallica? Do you like Iron Maiden? Hey do you know this band called Children of Bodom?"

and then I change the subject.

Metal has always been a very personal thing for me. I couldn't care less if my friends like it or not

I know I was recently talking to KRP about this. It seems everyone I meet who's into some form of non-metal music (be it rap, jam band stuff, country, whatever) who hears I like metal says "Oh you mean like Fugazi?" What an obscure band to choose to associate all metal heads with. And it hasn't just happened to me once. All through high school, all through college, then again a few weeks ago when my cover band was playing with some shitty Phish tribute band. I had a Candlemass shirt on and the bassist for the Phish tribute was like "you like metal? I love Fugazi!"

I just don't get it.

I know people tend not to really understand things they aren't that interested in (honestly, how many of you really understand hip hop, or jam bands), but this just baffles me. Not in a "you're stupid" kind of way, more in a "huh?" kind of way.


Also, while it can be frustrating that people miss-associate bands with what we like, looking down upon them for it is pretty lame. What if they simply have never been exposed to the extreme stuff? If all they know of metal is the mainstream stuff, how can they be expected to be intimately familiar with more obscure bands?